[Emerald U.]

Front Porch Forum: “Am I out of line for wanting to request a new roommate in assisted living after only a few weeks?” (09/25/2025)​

Image source: RDNE Stock project/Pexels

Pull up a chair, GrayViners! Today’s letter comes from someone facing a delicate situation. Take a look at what they wrote below.

Dear TGV,
When I moved into assisted living, I promised myself I’d stay open-minded. I told myself it would be an adventure. After all, I haven’t shared a room with anyone since my husband passed ten years ago.

But it’s been harder than I imagined. My roommate isn’t unkind, she’s cheerful and chatty, but she’s also loud, unpredictable, and messy. The television is on late into the night. Crumbs trail from her bed to the bathroom. She sings to herself in the mornings. I lie awake at night, tired and overstimulated, wishing for a door that closes.

I’ve hinted at the issue with the staff, but I always water down my words. I don’t want to be difficult. I don’t want to seem like the cranky old lady. But I also worked hard my whole life to finally rest. Is it really so wrong to want peace in these later years?

Longing for quiet,
Reconsidering the Roommate

And there you have it. If you were in their shoes, how would you handle things? We’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. Got a story of your own? Start a new conversation with us!

 

[angib55]

l thought that assisted living were like apts. You didn't share the room with someone else. l know the ones that l have visited and from commercials that they are 1 person rooms. Keep talking to staff about this situation and maybe they will do something about it

 

[NIBOR0]

Most assisted living places have a lot of semi-private rooms and few private ones. 80% of their funding comes from Medicaid and Medicaid typically only covers semi-private rooms. I know because I was a Nursing Home Administrator for an Assisted Living facility for almost 5 years here in Missouri. Please speak up and don't be afraid to ask the staff about other residents and if they would be a good fit for you if their room is available.