[Sophia M.]

Front Porch Forum: "Is it wrong to correct my grandkids’ grammar when it feels like I’m the only one who notices?" (08/19/2025)​

Words matter—but at what cost to connection? Image source: Pexels

Pull up a seat, GrayViners! “A Grandma Who Can’t Stay Quiet” is torn between wanting to share her love of language and keeping the peace with her grandchildren. When gentle corrections start to push them away, what’s the right balance? Read on and share your wisdom.

Dear The GrayVine,

My grandchildren are sweet, clever, and endlessly curious. I love spending time with them. But every time one of them says “I seen it” or “me and her went,” I feel a deep ache in my chest. It’s not just the words. It’s what they represent to me. I spent more than thirty years in the classroom, teaching children the beauty of language. Clear speech, thoughtful writing, precision in expression. I still believe those things matter.

Lately, though, every gentle correction I offer is met with rolled eyes or a sarcastic “Okay, Grandma.” One even joked that I talk “like a book.” That stung more than I let on. I don’t want to be the cranky elder no one wants to talk to. But I also don’t want to quietly watch a world I care about dissolve.

I know language changes. But I miss the respect that used to come with being careful about how you spoke. I don’t want to shame them. I want to share something I love. But I also don’t want to lose their trust or make our time together feel like a grammar lesson.

So now I’m wondering if I’m doing more harm than good. Should I keep speaking up and risk the distance? Or stay silent and let them find their own way with words?

Sincerely,
A Grandma Who Can’t Stay Quiet

What do you think, GrayViners? Have you ever struggled to pass down something you love, only to be met with resistance? How do you share without pushing too hard? Drop your advice and stories below. And if you’re carrying your own family dilemma, start a conversation here.