[Sophia M.]

Front Porch Forum: "Trying to Stay Low-Sodium" (07/22/2025)​

Everyone’s gathered—but is something being left unsaid? Image source: Pexels

Pull up a seat, GrayViners! “Trying to Stay Low-Sodium” needs your take on a family gathering gone slightly sideways. When health meets hospitality, what’s the best way to handle your own needs, without hurting feelings or revealing more than you’re ready to share? Read on and let us know: how would you navigate this tricky table?

Hi all,

I’m recently dealing with some health issues that require a strict diet, low salt, no red meat, and nothing too greasy or processed. My adult children don’t know I’ve been unwell; I’d rather keep it that way for now.

Last weekend, my son and daughter-in-law hosted a big family BBQ. Knowing I wouldn’t be able to eat most of what was being served, I quietly brought my own meal—grilled fish, rice, and vegetables. I didn’t make a scene, didn’t mention it to anyone, and even waited until the main rush was done before heating it up in the kitchen.

Later, my daughter-in-law told me it was hurtful—that it made her feel like her cooking wasn’t good enough, or that I was trying to make a statement. A few other relatives made passing comments too.

I didn’t mean to insult anyone. I just didn’t want to sit there eating nothing, or explain the whole health situation I’m not ready to talk about.

Did I overstep? Should I have warned them or just picked at what I could? Is keeping my illness private coming across as secretive or disrespectful?

Best,
Trying to Stay Low-Sodium

That’s the question, GrayViners. Have you ever tried to balance your own well-being with family expectations, or worried about keeping health matters private? How do you handle meals when your needs don’t match the menu? Share your experiences, gentle advice, and understanding below. Have a sticky situation of your own—food, family, or anything else? Start a conversation here.

 

[Hazeleyes]

You could have picked at a few things that you were able to eat that was served. You could have said that I am not feeling that well so I made myself something light to eat. I also wanted to be here to enjoy the company and see everyone.
I know that even when you tell people your health issues and diet needs that they do not always have stuff that is accommodating to your diet. I deal with this quite often with my family functions. (I have stage 2 kidney disease and high cholesterol) I know what it is like.
Hope you continue on your dietary needs and live a fulfilling life. Take care.

 

[Arkie98]

Maybe explained to your daughter in law of your restrictions. Though we don't like to, maybe you should consider telling your family you have a few health issues and have to be careful what you eat. I have eating issues, have told my kids and have asked them to fix what ever they were going to as there is always some thing i can find to eat.