[Sophia M.]

Front Porch Forum: “Is it okay to leave a longtime craft group if the atmosphere has turned mean-spirited?” (09/06/2025)​

Stitched together once—but is it time to unpick the seams? Image source: Pexels

Pull up a seat, GrayViners. “No Room for Gossip” once found healing and belonging in a quilting circle—but now finds whispers and sharp words instead of comfort. When the community that carried you starts cutting deep, do you stay loyal or protect your peace?

Hi GrayVine,

Ten years ago, I joined a quilting circle that saved my sanity. I was newly widowed and unbearably lonely. Those women took me in, gave me tea and scissors and laughter. We stitched through sorrow and joy. But something has shifted. What used to be a safe space now feels sharp-edged. The laughter is still there, but it often comes at someone else’s expense.

There are whispers when someone leaves the room. Snide remarks disguised as “jokes.” I’ve even caught wind of things said about me, and the sting runs deep. I go less and less now. I tell myself I’m busy, but the truth is I dread the emotional aftermath. Still, there’s guilt. We’ve been through a lot together. Am I abandoning the ship, or preserving my peace?

I miss how it used to be. But I don’t want to keep showing up just to be part of something that no longer feels kind.

Wrestling with loyalty and self-respect,
No Room for Gossip

What do you think, GrayViners? Have you ever outgrown a group that once felt like family, or struggled to leave something behind even when it no longer felt kind? Share your wisdom and stories below. And if you’re facing a dilemma of your own, start a conversation here.

 

[Whisper]

I would find another outlet. It is important to keep your own peace. These well-meaning people are plain mean and will destroy your sense of well-being.

 

[Gayle B.]

I agree with Whisper! Keep your sanity and leave their negativity behind! It’s no longer a good and safe space for you!

 

[Arkie98]

Keep your sanity and move on. Find another out let you enjoy. If you enjoy quilting find another group.