[James Matthew Najera]

Front Porch Forum: "Should I say something after my kids completely ignored my retirement milestone?" (08/21/2025)​

Image credit: Pexels/Kampus Production

Pull up a seat, GrayViners! “Celebrated Everyone But Me” gave four decades of hard work, only to feel invisible when retirement finally came. Hurt by a simple text where she’d hoped for a little recognition, she wonders: is it wrong to want more, or just natural to want to be seen?

Dear GrayVine,

Forty-one years. That’s how long I worked at the same company. I showed up early, stayed late, missed vacations, skipped lunches, and poured myself into a job I didn’t always love, but one I showed up for, every single day. I wasn’t expecting a parade or confetti when I retired, but I thought my kids might at least show up with cake.

Instead, all I got was a quick “Congrats” in the family group chat. No dinner. No flowers. No small gesture to mark the end of a very big chapter in my life. They’ve thrown celebrations for their friends’ promotions, coworkers’ engagements, and even the dog’s birthday. And yet, for their own mother,nothing.

I’ve always been their biggest cheerleader. But now that it’s my turn to be seen, it feels like I’ve faded into the background. I’m not looking for a party. I just want to know if they see me, if they care.

Is it petty to be hurt? Or is it just human?

Wondering where I stand,
Celebrated Everyone But Me

What do you think, GrayViners? Have you ever felt overlooked at a milestone moment, when you hoped for a little more recognition? How did you handle the disappointment while still keeping family bonds strong? Drop your advice and stories below. And if you’re carrying your own dilemma, start a conversation here.

 

[angib55]

l know the feeling and mine have been hurt too. l have always made big deals of birthdays/anniversaries-my husband daughter SIL grandsons and step kids. When l turned 70 in April, l was hoping for something but didn't get anything. No cards cakes nothing. My husband did take me to dinner but that was it. l felt and still feel that my milestone was totally forgotten